Thursday, August 16, 2012

The Olympics! Hooray!

As many of you know, I am not a fan of the Olympics. Well, it isn't truly that I am not a fan, rather more that I think the money we spend to have the Olympics seems extremely excessive when we have starving people in our country and our government borrows $.40 of every dollar it spends. Also, it seem like every year there are more and more of the atheletes in competition busted for using illegal performance enhancing drugs. Seems a bit like other professional sports that we unfortunately glorify in the fine country.

In my opinion, we should sit out of the Olympics until we can afford to pay our own way with our own money. But, that wouldn't stroke most of Americans "superior over the rest of the world" ego we have, so we borrow the money (thanks, China!) and compete anyway. So, in celebration of these amazing atheletes, here are some great quotes from NBC sports.

Here are the top nine comments made by NBC sports commentators during the London Summer Olympics that they would like to take back:

1. Weightlifting commentator: "This is Gregoriava from Bulgaria. I saw her snatch this morning during her warm up and it was amazing."

And it looked like a penis?

2. Dressage commentator: "This is really a lovely horse and I speak from personal experience since I once mounted her mother."

Horses are lovely to mount?

3. Paul Hamm, Gymnast: "I owe a lot to my parents, especially my mother and father."

Hooray to my mother and father!  And, to my mother and father!

4. Boxing Analyst: "Sure there have been injuries, and even some deaths in boxing, but none of them really that serious."

Lucky for you, death is NOT serious.

5. Softball announcer: "If history repeats itself, I should think we can expect the same thing again." (this must be from 2008?)

Did I just say that?  Did I just say that?

6. Basketball analyst: "He dribbles a lot and the opposition doesn't like it. In fact you can see it all over their faces."
Skilled in dribbling all over faces.

7. At the rowing medal ceremony: "Ah, isn't that nice, the wife of the IOC president is hugging the cox of the British crew."

If they start going down on each other, I'm turning the channel.

8. Soccer commentator: "Julian Dicks is everywhere. It's like they've got eleven Dicks on the field."

Nothing like a field full of Dicks.

9. Tennis commentator: "One of the reasons Andy is playing so well is that, before the final round, his wife takes out his balls and kisses them... .... Oh my God, what have I just said?"
Kissing balls goes a long way.